I mean, c'mon, why would Bill Belichick even think he needs help inside Gillette ? Is there anyone in Chowdahville who's even remotely unhappy with Little Bill ? And what's really weird is even the good coaches on their own home fields have a posse. But where's the threat ? Okay, maybe at a college game, there might be some drunken rabble better known as 'students' loose on the field but at an NFL game, paying customers do not hop the wall unless they're begging for a perp walk. They'll both have their own ring of uniformed muscle. How come football coaches need armed guards on the field with them ? Seriously, watch next time a game ends and the two coaches meet in the middle for the ritual 'bite me' handshake. Do us all a favor, Colts, and squish the fish. An undefeated season just doesn't happen all that often. If you rest Peyton and Marvin and The Edge, you may very well win the Supe but you're gonna regret not running the table. But they do give out Super Bowl rings every year. Look, you're right, Tony, they don't give out rings for going 16-0. He doesn't have to get sick and die of cancer or anything but we need another Pic and Magic show. Whoever drafts him, please get him a slow white fullback roommate from a Southern school who cracks racist jokes just as Reggie gets set to run his 40-yard dash.

But if we're gonna roll out the Gale Sayers comparisons, I just have one simple request. And if you go just by his highlight films, the young man's got mad skills and should have a ball balling in the National Football League. It's amazing what you can do with Tommy Maddox back on the bench.Р”Р„in't no flies on Reggie Bush, the latest landslide winner of the Big Stiff Arm Trophy. And major props to the Iron City boys who stuffed Da Bears in Da Cold and Da Snow and put themselves right back in the AFC wildcard chase. Meanwhile, the Bucs stepped it up against my Panthers who honestly looked a little drained from their de-Vicktimization the week before. He said he'd cause problems and he sure as hell did. Boy, you sure gotta give it up to Terrell Owens. A sad end to a sad campaign for the NFC powerhouse. Watch out, the Patriots ain't quite dead yet. I was hoping for the 'Group Of Unspeakable Horror' or the 'Group Of Indescribable Pain And Agony' or, if we had gotten really lucky, maybe even the 'Group Of Ten-Hours Of Labor'. 8 in the latest FIFA rankings, we should have fared better. Hopefully, we'll do better than expected but still I'm disappointed in the draw. They'll be together in the so-called 'Group Of Death' with Italy, Ghana and the Czech Republic. Where do I sign? Of course you do.Р”Р„nd so the US soccer team got the bad news at the World Cup draw last week. What do you say to 5 years and $47,000,000 ? You say. Ryan, you've saved a whopping total of 42 major league baseball games. Kenny Rogers, you're 41 years old and like to punch cameramen. For your lifetime record of 49-50, you can have 5 years and $55,000,000. Only instead of Elmos or 2-for-1 Korean DVD players, they're bidding on has-been or never-was pitching arms. Big league baseball teams pout and cry and stamp their feet over player salaries and then trample each other like frenzied Christmas moms at a 6:00am Wal-mart. How come they're not a legion or a brigade ? Or how about a squadron ? Wouldn't that would be a great name for pass catchers ? And if the defensive backs are called the 'secondary', why isn't the defensive line called the 'primary' ? Can you actually have a secondary without a primary ? Yes, I know, I have no life. How come linebackers are a corps ? And why a corps ? Why doesn't anyone call them a battalion or a regiment ? And how come running backs aren't a corps too ? They're on the same team but they don't get a military unit name. Spurious thoughts and idle musings from the sports week just past.

Quadraphonic blaupunkt